Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I just gargled with NyQuil
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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