Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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