I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
