I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
