is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
