I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I would fuck him just for his dog
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