Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I am in a vortex of obligation.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
i drank out of a bidet.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
