The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
