I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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