idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize