If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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