ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
