Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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