He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize