so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
