Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Randomize
