make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
