I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
