i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
