I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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