If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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