There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
