Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
