Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
