Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
