Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
