Already got asked if we're dating
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
