Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
