so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
