I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
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