I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
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