Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
