I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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