I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
