the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
