Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
