Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
