D3 body, D1 cock
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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