i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
These tits shall not be calmed
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
