P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
