but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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