Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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