You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
