I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
