so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
i need some magic done to my vagina
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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