He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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