I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize