Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Randomize