i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
