5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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