I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
